Quotes by Will Rogers

Democrats never agree on anything, that's why they're Democrats. If they agreed with each other, they would be Republicans.


Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.


Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.


Everything is funny as long as it is happening to someone else.


Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.


I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.


I have a scheme for stopping war. It's this - no nation is allowed to enter a war till they have paid for the last one.


I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!


If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them.


Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.